Depressed

Yes, I'm depressed.

No, it's not dire.

I don't feel like doing anything.  I can make myself, but I still don't like it.  I'm in such a mood that I'd rather sit on the couch and not move as opposed to doing almost anything.  I'm actually feeling a tad better today.  I wanted to blog about this on Thursday but simply could not bring myself to do so.  Not that I didn't want to, I just couldn't be bothered.  I think it's the weather.  The holidays.  The final exams coming next week.  The scale creeping so slowly in only 1/10 of a pound increments.  But I'm not allowed to be depressed.

That's my sister's "thing".  If she comes off as depressed at all, everyone is calling me and asking me to check on her, pleading with me to be extra kind to her, and just in general revolving the entire universe around her.  If I'm depressed, I get told that I'm not and that I need to be less dramatic.  Wonder why I learned to just shut my trap and not bother anyone with my problems.  Whether imaginary or legit.

Bollocks.

To distract myself yesterday, I made a couple candies to the holidays.

Hard caramels that (if I may toot my own horn) rival Werther's Originals.  My first try!

And I made gumdrops!  The red ones are orange flavored and the green are lemon.  I think they'll be used to decorate the gingerbread house I'm making with my niece this year.

The gumdrops aren't ready yet as they take two days to cure, but I have sampled a few and they're delicious!

Also, i think it's about time to start thinking about New Year's resolutions.  It IS coming fast.

My Motivation... Have You Seen It?

Another week, another pound lost.

But I don't even care.  That makes me sad.  I should be all YAY I'M LOSING WEIGHT!!!!!! but instead i really can't even get motivated enough to celebrate.  I'd rather just sit here on the couch and... well... sit.  It's around seven pm on Saturday and my poor husband hasn't been fed dinner.  I don't even really care.  It's not like he's going to starve.  He'll fend for himself if need be.  The kicker?  I'M hungry and can't be bothered to make anything.  So yes, I am depressed. 

It's not a dire sort of depression as of yet.  I'm still here enough to recognize the problem and I'm pretty sure I could snap myself out of this round of it.  I'm gonna try anyway.  I've made a hair appointment for Tuesday.  I hate to spend money on myself. Hate it.  If it will make me feel beautiful, it'll be worth the cost.  Heck, the scalp massage is worth the cost.  While I'm there, I shall peruse their OPI nail polish selection and bring something pretty home to do my nails with.  Maybe something festive!  I wish I could find this:

It's OPI's color called "The Rainbow Connection" that's coming out along with the new Muppets movie in November.  I want it.  Doesn't it just look like a bottle full of happy?  Of course, I'll probably have talked myself out of spending money by then.