Worse than the plague, natural disasters, and hormonal skin...

Well.. not really.  But due to my unreasonable body hatred, I feel sick to my gut on an equal level with thoughts of plague, disasters, and waking up to find the skin on your face has become a horrific, hormonal mess a la stereotypical teenager.

What's got me sick?

SWIMSUIT SHOPPING.

Did you feel it?  That twisting in the pit of your stomach?

I'm all about people feeling good in the body they have.  I will not judge you for your swimwear choice provided you keep everything legally required to be covered, covered, and don't stick your boobs right in my husbands face (you skank).  BUT.  Remember.  I hate my body.  That nagging voice is still there.  That fat chick telling me:

• I'll look ridiculous
• Nobody wants to see that
• Someone will make you feel ashamed
• Fat people should dress for their size
• They're all gonna laugh at you

How do I deal with that?

I want to look cute and be able to wear a bikini so badly but I'll likely go for a full coverage/slimming/flaw hiding one piece yet again.